Religious elders went to court to support the man who sexually abused Violet
All names and identifying details have been changed.
Participants have given us permission to share their experiences.
Violet grew up in a large family. Her father was violent and abusive to her mother and after the couple separated, her mother met someone from a closed religious order who seemed kind and gentle.
But a member of the congregation sexually abused Violet, and she did not want to spoil her mother’s happiness by speaking out.
The stepfather was a strict Jehovah’s Witness and Violet describes how this faith came to dominate the family’s life. The children still went to school but were not allowed to socialise afterwards. Any interaction with non-Witnesses was discouraged, on the grounds that they were ‘morally corrupt and not in the truth’.
Violet explains that the Jehovah’s Witnesses do not recognise national law, only that of God. Females are brought up to be very chaste and if she mentioned anything to do with sex she was told that she had ‘a dirty mind’. She remembers being told that organisations such as Childline were considered as dangerous, run by ‘wolves in sheep’s clothing’ who take children away from the faith. She was told that police and teachers were not to be trusted either.
She comments that her stepfather did not seem prepared to take on a large family and deferred to a member of the congregation called Martin. Her mother was happy, because her new partner was kind and did not hit her. Not wanting to spoil her mother’s happiness, Violet didn’t tell her when the abuse started.
Violet does not recall exactly when Martin started to touch her, but she knows that at first she did not understand what was happening. The abuser convinced her it was somehow her fault, saying that she was flirting with him and ‘tempting’ him. Martin would touch her through her clothing. Martin stopped abusing Violet when she was 14 years old and she realised that what was happening was wrong.
Violet reported the abuse to the police 11 years later. Her report was prompted by discovering that one of her sisters had also suffered sexual abuse by Martin, and that he had a granddaughter who stayed in his house at weekends. By this time she was a mother and she says she had to come forward in case the little girl was in danger.
The police investigation lasted a year and a protection order was put in place to protect Martin’s granddaughter.
In court, Martin denied all the charges. The elders in the congregation were there to support him as Violet’s mother gave evidence. She had left the Jehovah’s Witnesses earlier and been shunned by them. Martin was convicted of the abuse of Violet, her sisters and others. He was given a custodial sentence. Violet expects he will ask the Jehovah’s Witnesses for forgiveness and they will take him back.
She also thinks it is very likely there are many other victims in the community. She discovered after the trial that two more girls reported sexual abuse by Martin, but he was cleared by the elders and the girls were punished by their parents for the embarrassment.
Violet emphasises how difficult it is for any female to complain about a male Jehovah’s Witness, adding that ‘for a child abuser this makes life very easy’.
She would like the Jehovah’s Witnesses to acknowledge how their rules failed her, but they will not apologise to her. She comments that there were many good people in the order, but some bad people hiding among them.
Both of Violet’s sisters have found it difficult to cope in later life after being sexually abused. They have been affected by suicide attempts, psychological problems and alcohol abuse. Violet herself suffers from PTSD and she says the abuse has made her very protective towards her own daughter.
She left the order in her late teens and is now training as a therapist. She says that in many ways she feels lucky, as so many others have had their lives destroyed by being sexually abused as children.