Despite his horrendous childhood, Jaden has worked in his community to support troubled youngsters
All names and identifying details have been changed.
Participants have given us permission to share their experiences.
Following the death of his father, Jaden was left at the mercy of a succession of brutal abusers in the care system.
It is painful for him to relate the harrowing experiences he endured as a child, and the effect they had on him.
Jaden has not even told his partner about the abuse he suffered, and it was difficult for him to speak at times when he shared his account with the Truth Project.
He describes growing up in a deprived area, in a larger family with several older siblings.
By the time he was nine or 10 years old, his school attendance was so erratic that he was made a ward of court. He was placed in a children’s home where staff ran a harsh regime of punishments and long hours of hard domestic work. He recalls ‘From 7 in the morning ’til 9 at night you’d be on your hands and knees scrubbing and polishing’.
He left there when he reached secondary school age, but got into trouble and appeared in juvenile court. His mother told the court to take him away, saying she couldn’t handle him.
Jaden was moved to another children’s home. With obvious pain, he says ‘I still have nightmares about what happened in there’.
The home was run by a cohort of males who applied brutal and unpredictable discipline and punishment to the children they were supposed to care for.
Jaden remembers that when the boys were called in front of the headmaster, Mr Smith, ‘You were warned to look him in the eyes, but then he would ask “What the fuck are you looking at?” and batter you. If you didn’t look at him, he shouted “Look at me” and battered you’.
Beatings from Mr Smith were administered with a walking stick with a brass end. Jaden says he was not satisfied unless the victims were screaming so loudly it could be heard all over the building. He used such force that the boys were in agony for at least a week. They were usually sent to the sick bay until the bruises and welts subsided.
When the boys went to shower, they had to run a humiliating gauntlet of staff members who would hit them with wet towels on their testicles and backsides.
Less than a year after Jaden arrived at the children’s home, Mr Smith left and a new headmaster, Mr Evans, arrived. Jaden ran away from the home many times, and on being returned after one attempt, he was woken at 2am and taken to Mr Evans’s office.
While another teacher, Mr Jones, held him down, Mr Evans beat Jaden’s legs apart, then forced a rod up his anus, before beating him. Jaden was about 12 years old.
One night after this, Mr Jones came to the dormitory and took Jaden to a side room. Jaden was raped. He knows there was also an older boy in the room but he does not know if both of them raped him. He says ‘I had a blanket over my head’.
He only tried once to tell anyone what was happening in the home. On another attempt to escape, he was picked up by the police and spoke about the abuse. He remembers being told ‘These people spend time looking after people like you, and we don’t need to hear your fucking lies’.
He adds that Mr Jones was considered an upstanding pillar of the local community near the school, and ‘you couldn’t say anything about him’.
Jaden was finally able to escape the torment of the children’s home when he reached school leaving age. He had managed to get a bedsit and was supporting himself by working shifts in two jobs.
But social services caught up with him and because he was working under age in a bar, they sent him to a hostel. The man who ran it came into his room and tried to rape him. He says ‘I legged it, and I kept away from social services then’.
Although it is many years since he left the care system, Jaden continues to suffer many adverse effects of the abuse. He has physical health problems related to the harsh conditions and work he was forced to do. He has used illegal drugs, has difficulty trusting authority and people, and finds it hard to show and receive affection. He has self-harmed and had suicidal thoughts. He suffers nightmares and flashbacks, and feelings of worthlessness and that he is a burden on others.
Jaden says that for many years, he hated his mother for sending him and his brother away. But he now understands that after his father was killed, his mother was working in three different jobs to try and support the family, and was simply unable to cope with all the children.
For this reason, he feels very strongly that families in need should be supported so that children can stay with their parents. He says that if children have to be put in care, they should only be placed in small, family sized units, not large institutions where children form hierarchies and gangs.
Jaden adds what ‘might have helped me was someone who listened to me about what it was really like. No one asked why I kept running away’.
He has children, and was determined their childhoods would be nothing like his. They have all gone to university. He and his partner have been involved in voluntary work in the community. He says ‘It is not hard to see the kids that have got problems … it doesn’t take a lot to help’.