Jason’s uncle exploited his need for affection, and sexually abused him for over a decade
All names and identifying details have been changed.
Participants have given us permission to share their experiences.
Jason describes a ‘neglectful, difficult and violent’ early childhood with his parents.
He was removed from the family home into the care of his uncle, but his uncle sexually abused him throughout the rest of his childhood until he was in his late teens.
Jason says ‘We had the worst childhood ever … my sister didn’t say her first word until she was seven… there were so many signs’. He explains that social services were involved with the family, but the children were not allowed to speak to them.
He was sexually abused multiple times by the uncle who was supposed to be caring for him. This began when he was about six years old and continued for more than a decade. His uncle groomed him by showing him affection and giving him money.
Jason suffered injuries as a result of the abuse. He says ‘I thought it was love because I had no love at home … when I look back it’s horrifying.’
He says that his sister and brother were abused by their uncle and he witnessed sex acts between groups of men at his uncle’s home. During this time, he was also sexually abused by another man who was involved with the Salvation Army.
Jason has been interviewed by the police about his abuse but, ‘the court case is taking forever’. He has been offered criminal injuries compensation, but says ‘I just want someone to say sorry … no amount of money is going to change anything.’
He says the impact of the sexual abuse on his life ‘is horrific’. He still vividly remembers the physical pain it caused and he has been on medication for many years to try and cope with the effect on his mental health.
He did not take any exams, and has not been able to hold down a job. The sexual abuse has affected his relationships with his partner and children. He says ‘as someone who’s been abused, you become quite hyper-vigilant’.
Jason says that any children not engaging with education or showing possible signs of abuse or neglect should be checked urgently, but sensitively, by social services and schools. He would also like to see better provision of long-term specialist support and counselling services.
He adds that social workers working with families should ensure that they focus on the children’s welfare as well as the parents.