Groomed and sexually abused at prep school, Lawrence is frustrated that the headteacher was not stopped
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Participants have given us permission to share their experiences.
Lawrence was sexually abused as a young boy by Stanley, the headmaster of the preparatory school he attended.
He says he could not tell anyone about the abuse. The school was old-fashioned in attitude and offered no pastoral care. In any case, Stanley’s offending seemed to be an open secret. Lawrence believes that many people, including parents of pupils, knew what was going on but no one did anything.
As the rumours grew, Lawrence recalls that even his mother was in denial and did not act. It was only when someone made a complaint that Stanley was quickly ‘helped to leave’ the school.
Lawrence thinks he was ‘paid off’, and parents were told that he had left for personal reasons.
When Stanley left, there was an expectation that the abuse should be forgotten as it was now all dealt with. Lawrence said this attitude was shared by his mother, who told him to pull himself together.
Stanley later appeared in a Crown Court case. Recently, Lawrence found out that the police were made aware of the names of children who may have suffered abuse, one of whom was Lawrence, but only two main charges were proceeded with.
The abuser was found not guilty and at the end of the trial, the judge told Stanley he could leave the court with his good name intact. Lawrence was furious and devastated when he heard this.
Lawrence says the police advised him that they had found a very large number of indecent images on Stanley’s computer, but none of these were taken into account at the trial and several witnesses’ cases were discarded and allowed to remain on file.
Some years later Lawrence realised more about the implications of what Stanley had done to him and other victims. He went back to the police to see whether the case could be reopened, and formally reported the crime again.
The police advised him that the evidence remained the same, and unless someone new came forward, no further action would be taken.
After the trial, the local police force told Lawrence, ‘do not worry, we’ll get him’. Lawrence found it reassuring that the police knew that justice hadn’t been done. However, Lawrence heard nothing further after the trial.
Lawrence says that later another victim did come forward but again the police advised there was no evidence to justify reopening the case. Years later Lawrence realised that what Stanley had done to him and other victims was grooming.
Lawrence went back to the police to see if the case was reopened. Lawrence had a long conversation with the police, but felt it was more of a public relations exercise.
The police advised that there was nothing further that they could do as there was no new evidence so, unless someone new came forward, there would be no further action.
Lawrence spoke to a journalist about the abuse with the hope that more victims would come forward. The journalist interviewed him and said that his story was a strong one and that it would be published. However, to his disappointment, the article was dropped with no explanation.
He remains frustrated with the police and criminal justice system for failing to prosecute his abuser.
This frustration intensified after Stanley died and he read Stanley’s glowing obituary. He describes this as a damning reminder of the missed opportunities that allowed this perpetrator to carry on abusing. He says this is what saddens him the most.