Simmeon was subjected to sexual abuse at boarding school and at home
All names and identifying details have been changed.
Participants have given us permission to share their experiences.
Simmeon was sexually abused by his older brother and two members of staff.
During school holidays, his older brother sexually abused him, and this continued for many years into his adult life.
Simmeon says he did not want for anything materially, but he did not get any emotional support as a child and he thinks he finds it hard to show his feelings as a result.
During one school holiday when he was about 11, Simmeon was invited to go and stay with his brother Jake at the house of one of Jake’s friends. Simmeon was younger than the two boys and he was really pleased to be asked.
During the night he woke up to find Jake and his friend were sitting on top of him, pinning him down on the bed and sexually abusing him. The friend’s mother heard Simmeon shouting and he recalls being taken to her bed for the rest of the night.
He says his brother never sexually abused him at their boarding school, and Jake did not spend long there before he was expelled. However, Jake continued sexually abusing Simmeon for decades after this. Simmeon says that at times Jake would be ‘nice and brotherly’ towards him, then abuse him. Sometimes Jake gave him money, which Simmeon says made him feel like a prostitute and also ‘disgusting and dirty’.
Simmeon told a friend what was happening and the friend would come round when Jake was on his way over, so that Simmeon was not alone with his brother. Simmeon says this did stop him being abused sometimes.
At school, Simmeon experienced abuse by two members of staff. It began when he was nine years old and continued for about seven years. One abuser was a member of the ground staff, Mr Jones, and the other was a senior teacher, Mr Smith.
Mr Smith would get Simmeon to sit on his knee and then fondle his genital area. On one occasion Simmeon tried to stand up to him, and Mr Smith beat him in front of other boys at the school. The headteacher spoke to Simmeon about what Mr Smith had done, and shortly after the teacher left the school.
A few years ago, Jake raped Simmeon and he decided to go to the police and report all the abuse he had experienced. The police investigated and Jake admitted to some of the earlier sexual abuse but not to rape. However, the case did not proceed. By this time Mr Jones was deceased and the police were unable to find Mr Smith.
Simmeon also disclosed the abuse to one of his parents and says they were supportive. Neither Simmeon nor his parents have any contact with Jake.
He says it is essential for children to feel they have someone to talk to, and to be believed.
Simmeon says the sexual abuse has had a huge impact on his life. He struggles with anger, has self-harmed and made many suicide attempts. He finds it impossible to maintain employment or any long-term relationships.