Torze was removed from a violent family then suffered abuse in the care system
All names and identifying details have been changed.
Participants have given us permission to share their experiences.
Torze grew up in an extremely violent household.
She was placed in care where she suffered physical and sexual abuse on numerous occasions.
One of Torze’s earliest memories is her father standing over her with a hammer.
After her parents separated, he would regularly come to the house drunk and try to break down the door.
She was 14 the first time she was sexually abused. It happened in a residential care home, by a boy who was also a resident. She remembers waking in the middle of the night with him on top of her. She felt extreme pain between her legs.
Torze didn’t tell anyone what had happened, but she ran away several times because she didn’t feel safe; she slept out in ditches and barns.
Some time after this, a group of boys gang raped a friend of Torze’s and then tried to do the same to her. But someone intervened and they stopped.
Torze experienced more incidents of sexual abuse over the next two years, in and outside residential care and in a foster home.
After one occasion a social worker was informed, but the abuse was not reported to the police. Torze remembers being taken to a sexually transmitted diseases (STD) clinic because she often got urinary infections. She says being sent there made her feel ‘dirty’. She did not feel the staff at the home showed her any care, but were vindictive towards her.
Soon after she turned 16, Torze was placed in care with another foster family. A local man, who knew the family, took her out and plied her with alcohol. On the way home, he stopped the car and sexually assaulted her.
When they arrived back at the foster house, he threw her out of the car so roughly that she suffered minor injuries. Torze left the foster home a few months after this happened.
Torze has suffered a breakdown and attempted suicide in the past. She has flashbacks and night tremors, and still feels unable to go out alone. She suffers with anxiety and has difficulty building and maintaining relationships.
She would like to see independent advocates available for children. She thinks that children need to be believed and that adults should be alert for signs of possible abuse.
Torze is now focused on her own family. She has children and grandchildren, and says that they support each other when things go wrong and celebrate good times together.